SWA Shitty First Drafts

HW 2/27 Shitty First Drafts

            Shitty First Drafts by Ann Lamott capitalizes on the importance and value to writing a first draft, most usually shitty ones. Initially, the author describes the importance of having the will to write and overcoming any mental obstacles we may present ourselves with. With our will, she explains, we must allow ourselves to write something we hate now but can clean up later. She makes a pretty dope nod to George Orwell’s 1984 in relation to the voices in our head when writing our first drafts. Overall Lamott explains the universal problem we all face when writing first drafts and advises us to push through them and use some techniques to make it easier.     

SWA Genre Analysis

SWA 2/23 Genre Analysis

Topic: American Obesity Cause and Affect

1.     Source one (academic): University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill published a study which determined the true source of childhood obesity. The source “says” the problem for children, instead of the previously thought fast food, is instead the child’s dietary habit at home presented by his/her parents or caregivers. The article “looks” professional serious and is ordered to deliver information precisely. The writing “sounds” mid-class smart and informative and cites multiple sources in its article.  

2.     Source two (diagram): Obesity System Influence Diagram illustrates the main roots, psychologically, physically, socially, economically, and several more. The diagram “says” which factors influence people to develop the obese habit. The illustration “looks” like a spider diagram with easily over 100 boxes to which half sentence phrases fill with “Media” à “Media consumption” à “Importance of ideal body size-image” à “Peer pressure.” The diagram “sounds” informative and quick in the sense that you might fly from one section to another.

3.     Source Three (other): Comic by Dan Piraro illustrates two chubby vampires sitting on a bench late at night, the vampire on the left says, “Sure is getting hard to find low-fat blood.” The comic has a comedic tone and great illustrative graphic. The humor is smart and relative considering obesity is hard to miss in the US. 

Draft 3

Literacy Narrative Draft 3

            My name is Daniel Ramirez and I was born in California under the horrible hot summers and amazingly better, than summer, winters. I play piano and love long walks on the beach, that is, of course, a horde of undead are in pursuit. I attended a catholic school from K-6^th then jumped straight into a performing arts academy, 7^th-12^th, where I followed my love for drawing. I have two older brothers and a niece and nephew. I wish to become a Civil Engineer and create new eco-returning structures for the future. There’s a crap ton of writing with that, I know.   

            My reading and writing life has been defined by my undying admiration of the undead horror genre. George A. Romero was a filmmaker who engineered the modern zombie, creating every well-known adopted zombie attribute. I was about nine years old when I saw my first real zombie film, Return of the Living Dead, and was scared out of my life. Although it wasn’t created by Romero himself the movie was a gateway into Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead and Day of the Dead, all gorey and bloody entertaining. The power the genre has is incredible, drawing me closer to it. Being ALONE in a world without rules, without friends or family, without your luxuries is an absolute terror on its own, now add your family, neighbors, and friends whose only drive is to ultimately consume your entirety without hesitance or remorse, now that is true horror. This is emotion striking entertainment that makes me feel something, be it scared or impressed. My obsession for the undead grows as books, films, and television sprout and develop which inspires me to dive deeper into the apocalyptic setting in search of more moments, stories, and lives I can collect from and emulate.

            Film must be understood and comprehended. They tell stories and inspire emotion. Through the art of film I had felt anxiety, stress, and fear. The most terrifying situation imaginable was supplied before my demand. An apocalyptic world without order, protection, or luxury. The idea of placing us, who are oh so comfortable, in a truly unforgiving world where potential death balances on our ability to adapt seems unbelievably uncomfortable and terrifying. The way filmmakers captured the psychological toll and dehumanization of the human under stressful circumstances inspires me to branch my understanding when writing creatively. For example, in Romero’s Day of the Dead the characters are held underground with a hoard of undead sitting above them, instead of the zombies posing the threat, the film looks closely at how we become the real monsters who deconstruct each other under true character moments. This is brilliant writing. As a viewer I put myself in that movie. I imagine myself crying and most likely being eaten out of pure lack of survivability. Being in the apocalyptic situation you would imagine other living humans to be the best companions in surviving but when they no longer have rules they no longer have limits. It’s the psychological game undead films play that inspire me to read more texts and write creatively, in that genre of course. Romero’s films push me to explore thematic elements within my own writing creatively and academically.

            Author Max Brooks wrote two of my favorite horror-comedy genre books. The Zombie Survival Guide and the more serious World War Z. The first book is amazing. It has details and diagrams, statistics, and “facts” it’s essentially everything a zombie lover “wants to need” and more. The book is addicting and about how to survive the zombie apocalypse using clever info-graphs and diagrams. It makes me believe the situations are real, it persuades me into taking him serious. It’s obviously false, yet explores our common sense. World War Z, nothing even close to the film, was amazingly written. It follows dozens of accounts in the fictional world of an ex-apocalyptic modern world. The global scale of the book is present as you find yourself reading about a man in New York and then with the turn of a page you’re in Vietnam following a family man who was the sole survivor of a horde attack. Brook’s style of writing is one of immense detail, which I actually want to hear about as opposed to mandatory school novels. His writing carries a witty tone and I often find myself duplicating his style. When he wants to be serious he will churn your stomach with drama and suspense but suddenly release your breathe with instant humor and irony. Brook’s ultimately inspires me to write cleverly and tone-full with the purpose of generating a written atmosphere for my reader. Max Brooks inspires me to dive deeper into the horror genre and has shaped my literary taste.

            AMC’s The Walking Dead was and still is the only television show I have ever followed. I was home and my brother walks into the house with a bag from Walmart. In it contained the greatest piece of television/comic adaptation. He proceeds to place the bag on the counter and uncover the first season of The Walking Dead. Interested I did the usual flip to see the back cover. The effects looked real and believably disgusting. The faces of rotting bodies and hungry “walkers” was enough to motivate me to grab the disc and place it into my DVD tray. Episode one was all it took to hook me on the show. To my surprise it was hard to believe that the amount of gore was allowed on television. The character arcs and story development was flawless. The best part was the themes they had for every season. Season one was an introduction or realization of the world this community lives in. Season two was arguably really lame, but focused on the perseverance of surviving and building character story arcs. Season three shifted the threat from the undead to the living with the tagline “Fight the dead. Fear the living.” Now season four focuses on coming back from the worst. This show ultimately brings head splitting action with suspense and horror filled story that keeps me on the edge of my seat. It moves me to creative writing. A high school friend and I began writing a script style story that follows characters who go through the similar dark days on earth with apocalyptic twists. The Walking Dead combines amazing entertainment with rich storytelling so well it has inspired me to write and create my own apocalyptic story line.

            One thing the undead taught me is that humanity has an overwhelming obsession to control. We love knowing what’s next and planning how tomorrow will unravel. But undead force us to flip our worlds and face uncertainty, they turn us into the Dracula Van Helsing hunted, the Frankenstein Transylvania wanted dead. We become the legends, and with that opportunity we can prove we are either made to survive or succumb to the undead. The ideas lie beneath the gore and production value, they provoke me to think of another world, preferably destroyed by chaos, that some areas of our globe are actually facing (minus flesh eating walkers). It twists my stomach and takes advantage of my primal fears, yet presents commentary on the world thoughtfully and with depth. This makes me write for a purpose far larger in scope than the individual and read to understand us closer as a global society.  

HW 1/29

HW 1/29 Tan/Anzaldua

            The articles “How to Tame a Wild Tongue” and “Mother Tongue” examine individual experiences in which English has been affected by their heritage through the language itself or family. Initially both articles posed the disadvantage of not speaking, or being surrounded by some who do not speak English well. Tan illustrates her mother’s unfinished botchy English and its power to limit her during her strongest mental development stages thus negatively impacting her life. Anzaldua examines the criticism from both ends of the racial spectrum by not speaking a pure language but instead combining and compressing. Aside from sharing subject in common, Anzaldua seems to emphasize connection to racial heritage, while Tan focuses more on rising the acceptance of such languages throughout society.   

            Growing up in a Mexican family my parents speak English well and we’ve never faced a communications problem although I am seemingly losing my ability to speak Spanish. Earlier in my life I had balanced Spanish and English well enough to speak to my grandparents (Spanish only) and friends at school without mixing the two languages. I face the problem Anzaldua lightly addresses, I have lost my Spanish tongue. I have forgotten most words I knew and my ability to run a train of thought in Spanish seems impossible. As Anzaldua points out, “Until I can take pride in my language, I cannot take pride in myself,” criticism around her forces thoughts of self-censorship which leads to shame in acting upon other’s thoughts. As opposed to criticism and pride I feel a sense of shame based on my decreasing knowledge of my language which prompts me practice more often and regain the ability I once had. 

Virtual Peer Review

Virtual Peer Review Script

Carlo De Castro:

1.     I enjoyed the tone and delivery of the project. You kept it easy and straight forward with great examples and personal entries. It captured my attention through humorous statements made about the “stereotypical Asian household” and family stereotypes in general, I could relate.

2.     (a) Your project is about how your family and schooling career impacted your choice in literature and writing technique.

(b) The paper provides examples and separate topics in every paragraph that essentially relate or tie back to your thesis.

(c) You have stated influential events, experiences, books, and goals that have shaped your writing and reading life for the future.

3.     An area I can see some more detail added would be your high school life just because it exposes us to large variations of writing and reading. There’s opportunity to provide more depth in your experience or titles of influential books, teachers, etc.

4.     “Each of your paragraphs discusses only one idea, and everything in the paragraph is related to that specific idea.” 

5.     Your paper tells a story I want to read and continue reading. It holds my attention through some well-placed relatable stories about your personal life. The papers pace is fluid and not overwhelming. I felt your high school paragraph might have had some more room to expand and explain. You may be able to dive deeper with your English class experiences or any other class that may have shaped your writing and reading. You may also be able to name specific books or teachers who you hated or loved, teacher stories are the often entertaining (be them awesome teachers or lame).

Doyle Jones:

1.     I like reading about your personal life and it somehow has a good taste of humor. You advertise the outdoors so well, I might just go fishing this weekend. You have a style of writing that’s pretty awesome to read and relate to.

2.     (a) The paper is about how your childhood, people, and lifestyle influenced the reading and writing in your life.  

(b) I think your paper does a pretty good job addressing all your points. Every topic had a story.

(c) Yeah, in your paper I found examples in life that demonstrated the evolution in your love and/or hate for reading and writing.

3.     Since you’re an outdoorsmen I think a paragraph can be dedicated to writing or reading for your future be it about the outdoors or mechanical engineering. Cars are badass, I think talking about how they need some writing and reading to build would be expansive.

4.     Each of your paragraphs discuss only one idea, and everything in the paragraph is related to that specific idea.

5.     Your paper is comical and keeps me reading. Your examples flow well and sync to your thesis effectively. This paper is creative and sets me up for the next sentence. You can add more depth by including your specific career choice and its relationship with reading or writing. You have a love for the outdoors and reading more about the potential fishing, hunting, BMX-ing has on influencing your writing or reading would be a good touch.   

HW 2/12

HW 2/12 Summarizing The Everyday Writer 58-122

            Due to the large amount of text this summary will include topics I part take in and I find interesting. Early in the reading I truly practiced the techniques of brainstorming and word pictures to improve my writing desire and stamina. Writing sometimes takes to damn long, but when there’s a doodle accompanying it I suddenly feel cheery and not bored. On pages 66-67 we learn to gather the right and relatable information to support our thesis as it’s a usual problem with students who write. I found storyboarding to be an interesting new technique I might begin trying. Its usage of visuals and information seem quite gracefully combined, and it avoids logical vomit on my paper. On page 80 its actually promoted to dedicate a paragraph to defining a concept or word which I found interesting when it can also been seen as clutter or “fluff.” I found a section on page 114 that targets “it” and “there” with examples of proper substitution. This area is tough and is what I usually require work on, this involves my creative writing ability to figure out new intros to my sentence. 

HW 2/10

Summary HW 2/10 “Responding”

            The writer instructs a student, who is peer editing, the do’s and don’ts’ on editing with the intention of really helping the writer. He wants you to establish a position when reading your friends paper, specifically a test pilot or first line of defense. He also talks about your intended goals when editing, specifically editing as a reader not a hater. Instructions on bouncing feedback to the writer on his/her paper. Comment lightly and where needed most. He doesn’t want you to mark the crap out of the paper, it isn’t good for the writer and keeps your feedback clear and simple. Don’t praise the paper, no one is perfect and also be detailed when addressing a concern in your comments. Ultimately we are instructed to give the writer space, details, and opportunity to grow and progress with our reader’s feedback.   

HW 2/2

HW 2/2 P.3-36/211-220

            The introduction to The Everyday Writer (3-36) centralizes on the basics of proper written communication between a learning student and his/her peers and instructors. Topics include; most common written errors and how to avoid them, understanding your target audience beyond the classroom, and using media to present professionally and creatively. A large focus is placed on being understood and ensuring your message is properly sent. Sparking the reader’s interest with creative textual and image based presentation was key to a professional performance.

            Under the topics of Research, The Everyday Writer highlights the importance of an honest project with tips on avoiding plagiarism and using the proper sources. Proper usage of a quote is discussed along with the right time to paraphrase and summarize. Designing sentences to wrap around quotes may also be more beneficial than summarizing or paraphrasing due to the heightened sense of reliability. Deciding which quote and source to use is analyzed along with understanding audience knowledge to ensure proper citation.   

Literacy Narrative Draft 2

Literacy Narrative Draft 2

            My reading and writing life has been defined by my undying admiration of the undead horror genre. George A. Romero was a filmmaker who engineered the modern zombie, creating every well-known adopted zombie attribute. I was about nine years old when I saw my first real zombie film, Return of the Living Dead, and was scared out of my life. Although it wasn’t created by Romero himself the movie was a gateway into Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead and Day of the Dead all gorey and bloody entertaining. My fascination with the undead still continues as new books, films, and television series sprout and develop inspiring me to explore through reading and writing in the genre.

            Film must be understood and comprehended. They tell stories and inspire emotion. Through the art of film I had felt anxiety, stress, and fear. The most terrifying situation imaginable was supplied before my demand. An apocalyptic world without order, protection, or luxury. The idea of placing us, who are oh so comfortable, in a truly unforgiving world where potential death balances on our ability to adapt seems unbelievably uncomfortable and terrifying. The way filmmakers captured the psychological toll and dehumanization of the human under stressful circumstances inspires me to branch my understanding when writing creatively. For example, in Romero’s Day of the Dead the characters are held underground with a hoard of undead sitting above them, instead of the zombies posing the threat, the film looks closely at how we become the real monsters who deconstruct each other under true character moments. This is brilliant writing. As a viewer I put myself in that movie. I imagine myself crying and most likely being eaten out of pure lack of survivability. Being in the apocalyptic situation you would imagine other living humans to be the best companions in surviving but when they no longer have rules they no longer have limits. It’s the psychological game undead films play that inspire me to read more texts and write creatively, in that genre of course. Romero’s films push me to explore thematic elements within my own writing creatively and academically.

            Author Max Brooks wrote two of my favorite horror-comedy genre books. The Zombie Survival Guide and the more serious World War Z. The first book is amazing. It has details and diagrams, statistics and “facts” it’s essentially everything a zombie lover wants and more. The book is addicting. It makes me believe the situations are real, it persuades me into taking him serious. But there is no proof yet its common sense. World War Z, nothing even close to the film, was amazingly written. It follows dozens of accounts in the fictional world of an ex-apocalyptic modern world. The global scale of the book is present as you find yourself reading about a man in New York and then with the turn of a page you’re in Vietnam following a family man who was the sole survivor of a hoard. Brook’s style of writing is one of immense detail, which I actually want to hear about as opposed to mandatory school novels. His writing carries a witty tone and I often find myself duplicating his style. When he wants to be serious he will churn your stomach with drama and suspense but suddenly release your breathe with instant humor and irony. Brook’s ultimately inspires me to write cleverly and tone-full with the purpose of generating a written atmosphere for my reader. Max Brooks inspires me to dive deeper into the horror genre and has shaped my literary taste.

            AMC’s The Walking Dead was and still is the only television show I have ever followed. I was home and my brother walks into the house with a bag from Walmart. In it contained the greatest piece of television/comic adaptation. He proceeds to place the bag on the counter and uncover the first season of The Walking Dead. Interested I did the usual flip to see the back cover. The effects looked real and believably disgusting. The faces of rotting bodies and hungry “walkers” was enough to motivate me to grab the disc and place it into my DVD tray. Episode one was all it took to hook me on the show. To my surprise it was hard to believe that the amount of gore was allowed on television. The character arcs and story development was flawless. The best part was the themes they had for every season. Season one was an introduction or realization of the world this community lives in. Season two was arguably really lame, but focused on the perseverance of surviving and building character story arcs. Season three shifted the threat from the undead to the living with the tagline “Fight the dead. Fear the living.” Now season four focuses on coming back from the worst. This show ultimately brings head splitting action with suspense and horror filled story that keeps me on the edge of my seat. It moves me to creative writing. A high school friend and I began writing a script style story that follows characters who go through the similar dark days on earth with apocalyptic twists. The Walking Dead combines amazing entertainment with rich storytelling so well it has inspired me to write and create my own apocalyptic story line.